Tag Archive : Goals

In the age of social media we see loads of success, happy outcomes, and other causes for celebration. What we often don’t see is the dedication, preparation, sacrifices, and exhaustion behind those successes.

I am not a fan of letting people only see the results. It’s important to see the hard work and set-backs too.

From the outside looking in it appears I up and quit my job, got a contract with my old employer, and started a coaching business out of nowhere. Abracadabra, NEW CAREER!

Let’s dispel that myth.

In 2015, I began exploring the idea of being a career coach of some kind. My employer, the Council for Adult and Experiential Learning, had career advisors as contractors. As I learned more about what they do and how they do their work I became intrigued.

So in early 2016 I got TWO career coaching certifications- the Global Career Development Facilitator and Adult & Education Advisor. I worked all day and spent lots of week nights and weekend mornings doing more work. But it was, and is, rewarding. That’s how I knew I was on the right path.

I also took small business classes to start figuring out how the crap to set up a business. Not surprisingly, a liberal arts education did not prepare me for this. 

I won’t bore you with further details, simply know that loads of planning, thinking, saving, budgeting, etc went into that “abrupt” career change last fall.

Which brings me to the 5 Ps:

How are you preparing for success in 2019?

Earlier this month Daniel and I were visiting two friends in Seattle. He’s laid back, she’s full of energy. They are a perfect compliment to each other. We all went out for pie. Amazing pie. The kind of pie you’re going to want more of later.

Whoops, got distracted. Back to our adorable couple. When ordering, he asked her if she wanted a second slice for later. No, she replied. 

As the cashier took their order, she ordered a second slice at the very last moment. “100% on your terms, I get it” he smiled down at her. Later on, with equal love, Daniel affirmed my assertion that I was a “100% on your terms” kind of gal too. 

Picky. High standards. Uncompromising. Determined. Obstinate. Resolute. Stubborn. These are all synonyms of a sort but some have negative connotations, others positive. This concept, like any other worth thinking about, has pros and cons. 

Flexibility of mind does not come naturally to me. All of the above synonyms have applied to me pretty much since I could speak. Ask my parents, they have stories….

But I can and have improved. 

There are at least two concepts that I find helpful when trying to go with the flow. 

1. Be positive. When the human brain comes to a conclusion or plan, it’s because that’s the best one we could come up with. But what about the conclusions or plans we didn’t/couldn’t/ wouldn’t think of? 
2. Stay curious. Is there the slightest chance that if things don’t go exactly as planned they might go slightly better??? In a world of impossibilities the answer is always yes. 

I know some people have gotten tired of these phrases and ideas. But there’s a reason they’re ubiquitous. It’s because they’re useful dammit. If they don’t work for you let me know what does. Different routes to the same destination = success. 

I am still unbending when it comes to things of great importance to me. If you pick your battles wisely, this trait can be exceptionally useful. Weight loss/maintenance. Refusal to settle for a shitty job. Determination to get it right. 

This is one place where something less than 100% is acceptable. Perhaps even ideal.

Wasted time and inefficiency in general drives me crazy. So I sometimes plan things within an inch of their life. When you arrange the puzzle pieces beforehand you get a puzzle that fits together without gaps, overlaps, and blank space.

However, I’ve started to learn the value of blank space. For example, I’ve been on vacations where half-way through another person suggests a hidden gem to visit but I can’t fit it in because I’ve got other things planned each day.

Of course, this is nothing to cry over. In that instance I’m trading awesome for awesome. And there’s nothing wrong with that. But what if sometimes I could trade blank space for awesome?

As we approach the end of the year I’m reminded of my New Year’s resolution. “Leave rooms for the dreams you didn’t know you had.” In other words, maybe don’t plan things within an inch of their life.

When I quit my job to start a coaching business, it was a big leap into the unknown. Somehow I had faith that, even if I didn’t know exactly how things would turn out, they would turn out OK. Plenty of space for undiscovered dreams and goals.

So now not only am I building a coaching business, I’m an instructional designer. I’ve designed courses in several of my former jobs and I enjoy it. So getting paid to do it on my own schedule is pretty great.

I’m still a big fan of planning. But taking little leaps into the unknown has taught me not to fear the bigger leaps. Like quitting your job. I had a plan for that but it wasn’t set in stone. Thank goodness.

We build confidence to take risks by having the confidence to take risks.

If we’re ever to have the guts, chutzpah, (lady)balls, or daring to take a risk, it helps to look back on a previous risk that turned out for the best. And I am of the belief that unless said risk resulted in death or dismemberment, you got something good out of the experience. If only a lesson learned. And nothing is more valuable than learning.

The only way to fail is to not show up. So it was with that attitude that I quit my job and became a consultant. Four years of hard work paid off as I left my company with the prospect of immediate consulting work I was genuinely excited about.

And so I celebrate the signing of a contract. My first.

A toast to risks that give the confidence to take the next big leap.